Monday, April 13, 2009
Seinfeld Quotes
Here are some of our favorite quotes from the show about nothing. Did we miss one? Let us know by posting it on our Seinfeld Message Board, and we'll add it to the list! very funny Seinfeld quotes:"Produce section. Very provocative area. A lot of melons and shapes. Everyone's squeezing and smelling..."- Jerry in The Junior Mint "Y'know I remember when I was a kid growing up, kids would make fun of my name like you wouldn't believe - 'Jerry Jerry Dingleberry', 'Seinsmelled'..."- Jerry in The Junior Mint "As of today I am a proud parent of a one-mile stretch of the Arthur Berkhardt Expressway." - Kramer in The Pothole "Well, you're the big look expert. I wanna see how smart you are.""Trust me, I know the look." - Elaine and Jerry in The Wink "It pains me to say this, but I may be getting too mature for details." - Jerry in The Deal "Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason."- Jerry in The Baby Shower "Now listen, let's keep an eye on each other tonight. In case one of us gets in a bad conversation, we should have a signal that you're in trouble so the other one can get us out of it." "How old are you?" - Jerry and Elaine in The Stranded "I've always been a stall man."- George in The Note "It's one day. Half a day, really. I mean you subtract showers and meals, it's like twenty minutes."- Jerry to Elaine in The Pen "I can't go to a bad movie by myself. What, am I gonna make sarcastic remarks to strangers?" - Jerry in The Chinese Restaurant "You should've seen her face. It was the exact same look my father gave me when I told him I wanted to be a ventriloquist." - George in The Cafe "You see? Never be late for a plane with a girl. 'Cuz a girl runs like a girl-- with the little steps and the arms flailing out... You wanna make this plane, you've gotta run like a man! Get your knees up!" - Jerry, to Elaine in The Airport "Do you have any conceivable reason for even getting up in the morning?" "I like to get the Daily News." - Kramer and George in The Keys "Actually it was in gym class. I was trying to climb the ropes and Jerry was spotting me. I kept slipping and burning my thighs and then finally I slipped and fell on Jerry's head. We've been close ever since." - George, explaining how he met Jerry in The Outing "I hate asking for change. They always make a face. It's like asking them to donate a kidney." - George in The Trip "They don't have a decent piece of fruit at the supermarket. The apples are mealy, the oranges are dry... I don't know what's going on with the papayas!" - Kramer in The Mango "I want you to find out if she likes me." "Find out if she likes you? What, are you in high school?" - George and Elaine in The Doodle "I've been searching for someone a long time. Well, the search is over!" "And now the search for the right psychiatrist begins." - George and Jerry in The Doodle "Bro's no good. Too ethnic." "You got something better?" "How about the Mansiere?" "Mansiere." "That's right. A brassiere for a man." - Frank and Kramer in The Doorman "There should be a B.O. squad that patrols the city like a "Smell Gestapo". To sniff 'em out, strip 'em down, and wash them with a big, soapy brush..." - Jerry in The Smelly Car "Borrowing money from a friend is like having sex. It just completely changes the relationship." - George in The Puffy Shirt "It's so great to see a show that's about something."- Newman in The Cartoon "I think I've reached a point in my life where I can tell the difference between nougat and cookie." - George in The Dealership "You know the message you're sending out to the world with these sweatpants? You're telling the world, 'I give up. I can't compete in normal society. I'm miserable, so I might as well be comfortable.'"- Jerry in The Pilot "Well, the yogurt verdict is in.... FAT!" - Jerry in The Non-Fat Yogurt "The carpet sweeper is the biggest scam perpetrated on the American public since one-hour martinizing." - Kramer in The Suicide "I can feel his blood inside of me. Borrowing things from my blood."- Jerry in The Blood "It's the financial equivalent of a complete rectal examination."- Jerry, talking about his upcoming audit in The Truth "Women don't respect salad eaters."- Jerry in The Wink "Nobody drives like me. Nobody. I'm doing things in this car, you have no idea they're going on."- George in The Parking Space "Man, it's the nineties... It's Hammer time!"- Kramer in The Parking Space "She doesn't deserve a baby shower. She deserves a baby monsoon."- George in The Baby Shower "Maybe I'll go visit my mother. She just bought me some new panties and they're all laid out for me."- Elaine in The Cheever Letters "Why is nice bad? What kind of a sick society are we living in when nice is bad?" - George in The Cafe "I'm much more comfortable criticizing people behind their backs." - George in The Engagement "This is what I like, see? You come home and your parents are in your bed!" - Jerry in The Stakeout "When you look annoyed all the time, people think that you're busy."- George in The Hot Tub "Vandelay Industries, Kel Varnsen speaking. May we help you?"- Jerry in The Boyfriend "That's the true spirit of Christmas; people being helped by people other than me." - Jerry in The Pick "You're through, Soup Nazi. Pack it up. No more soup for you. Next!"- Elaine in The Soup Nazi "There's nothing more sophisticated than diddling the maid and then chewing some gum."- Elaine in The Maid "I relate to George through you. We're more like friends-in-law."- Elaine in The Dog "I wanted to talk about how we had nothing to talk about."- Elaine in The Dog "I just can't be with someone who's life is in complete disarray." - Kramer in The Puffy Shirt "Retail is for suckers." - Kramer in The Glasses "I've never heard of a relationship being affected by punctuation." - Jerry in The Sniffing Accountant "I want to be the one person who doesn't die with dignity."- George in The Pilot "I couldn't raise a kid? C'mon, I love bossing people around."- Elaine in The Blood "This woman hates me so much, I'm starting to like her." - George in The Masseuse "I've driven women to lesbianism before, but never a mental institution."- George in The Truth "Eight hours of jingle-belling and ho-ho-hoing. Boy, I am ho'd out." - Kramer in The Race "And we discover yet another talent... Posing as a girlfriend for homosexuals." - Jerry in The Beard "Man's Best Friend... Jerry, I want something like that on my tombstone." - Kramer in The Strongbox "I love the day date... No wine, no shower..." - Jerry in The Soup "Moles -- Freckle's ugly cousin."- Kramer in The Slicer "I would drape myself in velvet if it were socially acceptable." - George in The Label Maker "I think she finds my stupidity charming." - George in The Gymnast "I'm in the unfortunate position of having to consider other people's feelings." - Jerry in The Gymnast "I need the secure packaging of Jockeys. My boys need a house!" - Kramer in The Chinese Woman "It's a shame his parents didn't get divorced thirty years ago. He could've been normal." - Jerry in The Chinese Woman "People on dates shouldn't even be allowed out in public." - Jerry in The Big Salad "She had man-hands!"- Jerry in The Bizzaro Jerry "You know what they say, 'You don't sell the steak, you sell the sizzle.'"- Kramer in The Bizzaro Jerry "It's more like a full-body dry heave set to music."- George, about Elaine's dancing in The Little Kicks "If you can't say something bad about a relationship you shouldn't say anything at all." - George in The Stand-In "I spend so much time trying to get their clothes off, I never thought of taking mine off." - George in The Stand-In "Did you know that the original title for War and Peace was War, What Is It Good For?" - Jerry in The Marine Biologist "This woman is bending my mind into a pretzel." - Jerry in The Pie
Young Star Trek crew boldly walks red carpet
SYDNEY (Reuters) - The 11th Star Trek movie in 30 years had its world premiere on Tuesday, its markedly younger cast boldly going along the red carpet to a makeshift cinema in the Sydney Opera House.
Chris Pine, 28, who plays a cadet-aged James T. Kirk, admitted he'd never met William Shatner, who starred as the original Captain Kirk in the television series dating back to 1966 as well as the first Star Trek movies.
But he said he watched the TV show "quite a bit."
"All it was doing was making me think about what the best way I could do a William Shatner impersonation," Pine said. "It wasn't helping bringing this story to life."
Hundreds of fans, including one wearing "Spock" ears, waited for hours to meet the leading men who spent nearly an hour walking the red carpet, signing autographs and talking with journalists.
"It's hard to believe Eric Bana plays a meanie when he comes across as such a nice guy," said Alicia Wetherley, who drove from central Australia to the Opera House for the premiere.
Bana plays Nero, the film's heavily-tattooed Romulan villain bent on avenging the destruction of his planet.
He said all the film's cast "did everything they could" to come up with something fresh this time around.
The plot follows the young lives of the original cast from Gene Roddenberry's TV show as they find their places on the flight deck of the U.S.S. Enterprise as junior officers.
It was directed by J.J. Abrams, director of "Mission Impossible III" and "Lost."
"I was never a hugeStar Trek fan growing up and so what I hope people will experience when they see the movie is one that stands on its own," Abrams said. "It's a huge action spectacle but at the core it is got a big heart," said Abrams.
Zachary Quinto plays Spock, the role made famous by Leonard Nimoy, 77, who has a cameo in the film.
Nimoy had joined a campaign for the movie to hold its premiere in the small farming town of Vulcan in Alberta, Canada, that was unsuccessful, partly because the town has no cinema.
Gavin Vonhoff, a 27-year-old IT engineer from Canberra, said he hoped the film would carry "a message of hope to all Star Trek fans that Roddenberry's spirit was still alive" 18 years after his death.
"Star Trek" opens in Australian cinemas on May 7, one day before opening in the United States.
Chris Pine, 28, who plays a cadet-aged James T. Kirk, admitted he'd never met William Shatner, who starred as the original Captain Kirk in the television series dating back to 1966 as well as the first Star Trek movies.
But he said he watched the TV show "quite a bit."
"All it was doing was making me think about what the best way I could do a William Shatner impersonation," Pine said. "It wasn't helping bringing this story to life."
Hundreds of fans, including one wearing "Spock" ears, waited for hours to meet the leading men who spent nearly an hour walking the red carpet, signing autographs and talking with journalists.
"It's hard to believe Eric Bana plays a meanie when he comes across as such a nice guy," said Alicia Wetherley, who drove from central Australia to the Opera House for the premiere.
Bana plays Nero, the film's heavily-tattooed Romulan villain bent on avenging the destruction of his planet.
He said all the film's cast "did everything they could" to come up with something fresh this time around.
The plot follows the young lives of the original cast from Gene Roddenberry's TV show as they find their places on the flight deck of the U.S.S. Enterprise as junior officers.
It was directed by J.J. Abrams, director of "Mission Impossible III" and "Lost."
"I was never a hugeStar Trek fan growing up and so what I hope people will experience when they see the movie is one that stands on its own," Abrams said. "It's a huge action spectacle but at the core it is got a big heart," said Abrams.
Zachary Quinto plays Spock, the role made famous by Leonard Nimoy, 77, who has a cameo in the film.
Nimoy had joined a campaign for the movie to hold its premiere in the small farming town of Vulcan in Alberta, Canada, that was unsuccessful, partly because the town has no cinema.
Gavin Vonhoff, a 27-year-old IT engineer from Canberra, said he hoped the film would carry "a message of hope to all Star Trek fans that Roddenberry's spirit was still alive" 18 years after his death.
"Star Trek" opens in Australian cinemas on May 7, one day before opening in the United States.
'Star Trek' to get Sydney premiere
The world premiere of the new Star Trek movie will take place at the Sydney Opera House on April 7.
Paramount Pictures announced that the screening at the venue's concert hall will be attended by 1,600 guests, including director J.J. Abrams and stars Eric Bana, Chris Pine, Zachary Quinto and Karl Urban.
Executive Mike Selwyn said: "Not only are we honoured to have J.J. Abrams and the cast here in Sydney for the world premiere of the stunning new Star Trek, we are also very excited to present this event at one of Australia's-and the world's-most famous locations.
Paramount Pictures announced that the screening at the venue's concert hall will be attended by 1,600 guests, including director J.J. Abrams and stars Eric Bana, Chris Pine, Zachary Quinto and Karl Urban.
Executive Mike Selwyn said: "Not only are we honoured to have J.J. Abrams and the cast here in Sydney for the world premiere of the stunning new Star Trek, we are also very excited to present this event at one of Australia's-and the world's-most famous locations.
Are One Tree Hill, Supernatural and Smallville Safe?
What are the chances your CW faves will survive for another season?
The official verdict won't come down until the upfronts in May, when the networks unveil their new fall schedules, but CW president Dawn Ostroff and One Tree Hill star Sophia Bush are offering up a little early information.
Will the OTH cast sign on for another year? Will Clark Kent continue on for one more season in Smallville? And will Supernatural survive to hunt demons another day or could the Winchester boys go down before their time?
We've got the info and the odds...
ONE TREE HILL
Star Sophia Bush tells me, "We don't know [if we'll be back for another season]. The network keeps saying it's up to the cast, but no one has offered us another season, so we'll see. There are a lot of variables that would have to work out properly for people, but as long as there are good stories to tell, I think we're up to continuing to tell them. We're having a great time. We have such great guest stars on our show right now—Austin Nichols is one of my dearest friends. We actually went on, like, four dates after I split up from you know who, years and years ago, and we've been, like, the best of friends ever since. We're a big family at this point."
Predicted Response to One Tree Hill Cancellation: 8.8 on the fan Richter scale
Chances of Renewal: Even. The fans are always down for more One Tree Hill, but the cast, the writers, the studio and the network have plenty of financial, contractual and creative issues to work out before a new season is a sure thing. The good news for OTH fans is that executive producer Mark Schwahn is no longer attached to the CW's new Melrose Place retread, so until further notice, he is free to focus on your Tree Hill faves!
SMALLVILLE
According to CW president Ostroff, "We're starting to talk about [the possibility of season nine]. Obviously we're prepared either way. If the show doesn't go on, we have a series finale that the writers have been thinking about, but I think we'd all love to see the show come back creatively again. We've got a new team of writers who are running the show, and they've done a great job with the series this year. We've gotten great feedback from the fans. It's interesting because they've used more female characters this year, which I think helped it blend in with the theme of the network, so we'd love to see it back."
Predicted Response to Smallville Cancellation: 7.2 on the fan Richter scale
Chances of Renewal: Good, assuming Tom Welling is up for it—the show continues to have admirable ratings and has creatively thrived despite the exit of Kristin Kreuk and Michael Rosenbaum.
Sergei Bachlakov/The CW?2008 The CW Network, LLC.
SUPERNATURAL
According to Ostroff, "We've been creatively really happy with the show. The show's been holding its own. I hope it continues to do well because I'd love to see it back."
Predicted Response to Supernatural Cancellation: 10 on the fan Richter scale
Chances of Renewal: Excellent. By all accounts this is the most compelling season yet. The ratings are rising accordingly, and creator Eric Kripke had always planned a five-season arc. Shutting down SPN now would just be, well, evil.
Which CW series are you most hoping will stick around? Let the CW execs hear you! Holler in the comments below...
The official verdict won't come down until the upfronts in May, when the networks unveil their new fall schedules, but CW president Dawn Ostroff and One Tree Hill star Sophia Bush are offering up a little early information.
Will the OTH cast sign on for another year? Will Clark Kent continue on for one more season in Smallville? And will Supernatural survive to hunt demons another day or could the Winchester boys go down before their time?
We've got the info and the odds...
ONE TREE HILL
Star Sophia Bush tells me, "We don't know [if we'll be back for another season]. The network keeps saying it's up to the cast, but no one has offered us another season, so we'll see. There are a lot of variables that would have to work out properly for people, but as long as there are good stories to tell, I think we're up to continuing to tell them. We're having a great time. We have such great guest stars on our show right now—Austin Nichols is one of my dearest friends. We actually went on, like, four dates after I split up from you know who, years and years ago, and we've been, like, the best of friends ever since. We're a big family at this point."
Predicted Response to One Tree Hill Cancellation: 8.8 on the fan Richter scale
Chances of Renewal: Even. The fans are always down for more One Tree Hill, but the cast, the writers, the studio and the network have plenty of financial, contractual and creative issues to work out before a new season is a sure thing. The good news for OTH fans is that executive producer Mark Schwahn is no longer attached to the CW's new Melrose Place retread, so until further notice, he is free to focus on your Tree Hill faves!
SMALLVILLE
According to CW president Ostroff, "We're starting to talk about [the possibility of season nine]. Obviously we're prepared either way. If the show doesn't go on, we have a series finale that the writers have been thinking about, but I think we'd all love to see the show come back creatively again. We've got a new team of writers who are running the show, and they've done a great job with the series this year. We've gotten great feedback from the fans. It's interesting because they've used more female characters this year, which I think helped it blend in with the theme of the network, so we'd love to see it back."
Predicted Response to Smallville Cancellation: 7.2 on the fan Richter scale
Chances of Renewal: Good, assuming Tom Welling is up for it—the show continues to have admirable ratings and has creatively thrived despite the exit of Kristin Kreuk and Michael Rosenbaum.
Sergei Bachlakov/The CW?2008 The CW Network, LLC.
SUPERNATURAL
According to Ostroff, "We've been creatively really happy with the show. The show's been holding its own. I hope it continues to do well because I'd love to see it back."
Predicted Response to Supernatural Cancellation: 10 on the fan Richter scale
Chances of Renewal: Excellent. By all accounts this is the most compelling season yet. The ratings are rising accordingly, and creator Eric Kripke had always planned a five-season arc. Shutting down SPN now would just be, well, evil.
Which CW series are you most hoping will stick around? Let the CW execs hear you! Holler in the comments below...
Khan is dead: Star Trek II in his honor
Ricardo Montalban, who played the unforgettable villain Khan Noonien Singh, has passed away today at the age of 88.
A versatile actor, Montalban has the honor of being the Star Trek series' most memorable villain. Sure, the Borg are frightening. But Khan had style and an Ahab quality, and Montalban was able to portray him to maximum effect.
In the dubious Star Trek filmography, Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan is easily the best. The first film was a flagging, tedious piece that was never able to strike the right chord. More than anything, it was colorless and dull. If the Star Trek universe was to find a place in Hollywood, the franchise needed a recovery operation fast.
Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan was just what the doctor ordered. Bringing back one of the TV show's most memorable villains was a clever choice.
Montalban's villain was a genetically engineered superman who had ruled over millions of people in a bid for Earthly conquest... not dissimilar to his ancient Mongolian namesake. Frozen in space along with his core followers, he was thawed by the Enterprise crew and came into conflict with Captain James T. Kirk.
That's enough of a backstory. Star Trek II wasn't simply better than the first installment; it remains the jewel in the Star Trek crown, and though there were the occasional enjoyable installments (in fact, Star Trek II sets off a mini-trilogy of good films ranging through Star Trek III to Star Trek IV, before things turned really sour) none of them equalled the energy or excitement on display here. Kirk and Khan are engaged in a grim battle, with a superweapon as the Holy Grail. And of course, for anyone who has seen it, this film supplies the most heartfelt ending of the franchise.
I went to see this film during its opening weekend. It was a rainy afternoon, and I was very young with only a rudimentary background in Star Trek reruns. The line was long, and the theater crowded and noisy. As the film began, silence descended and moviegoers were noticeably pulled into its story. (Alas, afterwards everyone I knew could only talk about how the alien earwig scene gave them nightmares for years.)
And it's no idle comparison between Khan and Ahab. Moby Dick is quoted liberally, and Montalban gives revenge and obsession a bloody new face.
The Wrath of Khan hits the highest marks of entertainment and intelligent action in the series. This is one of those films which has invaded popular culture more than many realize, and its a sad, strange, but perhaps touching tribute that though Montalban has left us, quite a few people you know will be chanting that single name:
"KHAN!"
A versatile actor, Montalban has the honor of being the Star Trek series' most memorable villain. Sure, the Borg are frightening. But Khan had style and an Ahab quality, and Montalban was able to portray him to maximum effect.
In the dubious Star Trek filmography, Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan is easily the best. The first film was a flagging, tedious piece that was never able to strike the right chord. More than anything, it was colorless and dull. If the Star Trek universe was to find a place in Hollywood, the franchise needed a recovery operation fast.
Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan was just what the doctor ordered. Bringing back one of the TV show's most memorable villains was a clever choice.
Montalban's villain was a genetically engineered superman who had ruled over millions of people in a bid for Earthly conquest... not dissimilar to his ancient Mongolian namesake. Frozen in space along with his core followers, he was thawed by the Enterprise crew and came into conflict with Captain James T. Kirk.
That's enough of a backstory. Star Trek II wasn't simply better than the first installment; it remains the jewel in the Star Trek crown, and though there were the occasional enjoyable installments (in fact, Star Trek II sets off a mini-trilogy of good films ranging through Star Trek III to Star Trek IV, before things turned really sour) none of them equalled the energy or excitement on display here. Kirk and Khan are engaged in a grim battle, with a superweapon as the Holy Grail. And of course, for anyone who has seen it, this film supplies the most heartfelt ending of the franchise.
I went to see this film during its opening weekend. It was a rainy afternoon, and I was very young with only a rudimentary background in Star Trek reruns. The line was long, and the theater crowded and noisy. As the film began, silence descended and moviegoers were noticeably pulled into its story. (Alas, afterwards everyone I knew could only talk about how the alien earwig scene gave them nightmares for years.)
And it's no idle comparison between Khan and Ahab. Moby Dick is quoted liberally, and Montalban gives revenge and obsession a bloody new face.
The Wrath of Khan hits the highest marks of entertainment and intelligent action in the series. This is one of those films which has invaded popular culture more than many realize, and its a sad, strange, but perhaps touching tribute that though Montalban has left us, quite a few people you know will be chanting that single name:
"KHAN!"
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)